Who? What?

This site belongs to Drina, 20-something psychology nut who loves rats, painting, and Amnesty International.

Talk to me

E-mail me

Sonafidex

Some advice

Favorite Quote

"To announce there must be no criticism of the president, or that we are to stand by the president, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public."
Teddy Roosevelt

A good book

Buy Gordon's book (for me)

So said God

Be merciful
Luke 6:36

Hint hint...

Christmas gift? Birthday present?
(April 14th, FYI)

Sonafide.com

Seriously annoying unsuspecting surfers since 2001

March 30, 2003

Sleep deprivation makes great art

This last weekend I feverishly worked on my artwork for the student show, staying up until 5 am each night, even when I had to get up early to work the next day. I finished the painting High Noon (see the portfolio page), but I'm still not done with my drawing. I have shadows and backgrounds to draw, which actually cover the largest areas of the drawing. Here's what I got so far:

It's due Tuesday, and I pray I finish it on time. Of course, I'll probably be up until 5 am today, too, just drawing. Sleep deprivation is a small price to pay for having a drawing hang on a gallery wall.

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March 29, 2003

Journal books of the world

I'm not sure how I got there, but I spent a good half-hour browsing 1000journals.com. This project is an experiment in which 1000 blank journal books were sent around the world. Each person who recieved one had 24 hours to fill a page, then pass it on. According to the site, 999 of them are still in circulation.

Looking at some of the pictures, I can't help but feel like I really want to be a part of it. The pages of these books are full of stories, poems, pictures, paintings, collages... themes of love, war, death, uncertainty, run through the journals... profound exemplifications of humanness.

I wonder what my journal page would look like.

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March 28, 2003

Friday Five: All about this week

1. What was your most memorable moment from the last week? Giving a short talk to the Neuroscience Lab folks about what we're doing in the Animal Learning Lab. Not too exciting, I know. It was a boring week.

2. What one person touched your life this week?
Alicia. Her quote, "I can't imagine anyone not liking you, Drina. You're so nice." Thanks, Alicia, I needed that.

3. How have you helped someone this week?
Unfortunately, I didn't help out much this week. But last week I gave someone a ride home from the hospital. Does that count?

4. What do you need to get done by this time next week?
Artwork. The deadline for submission to the student art show is next Wednesday, so this weekend I'm going to be painting up a storm.

5. What one thing will you do this week to make your world better?
Pray for peace. I think that's the biggest and best thing anyone can do to make the world a better place right now.

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March 27, 2003

Furious all-night writing sessions

I probably look like a zombie right now. Pulling all-nighters can do that to you. I was sitting right here at my computer until about 4 am, at which point I completely gave up. Looking at my unconscious roommate sleeping in her bed made me jealous, so I crashed. This morning I got up early and finished my paper (which was about 8 pages long) and handed it in at 1:00.

EVERYONE in the class was beat. You could see it as soon as you walked into the room. People off in space, with their eyes glazed over. Nobody got any sleep, because they were all finishing this evil paper too (which was assigned only two weeks ago). Our professor noticed it too, and cancelled class for the day. She kicks you-know-what.

I'm not into these last few weeks of school. Just give me my stupid diploma already, and let me go. I'm too stressed, too burned-out, too tired to even care about how I'm doing. Words of advice kids: Don't major in psychology.

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March 26, 2003

Brown bags and aligator bites

My Professions in Psychology class met today at a restaurant called Amazon Trail. We brought brown bags full of objects that describe us, and we each stood up and played "show and tell." Our professor bought us drinks and appetizers. I ate aligator. Yes, aligator. The items on the menu were pretty exotic... frog's legs, aligator, other things I've never tried. It was good, though. Tasted like chicken :)

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Rehumanizing collateral damage

Yesterday many of us went to a hospital where wounded people are being taken. We went into the wards to talk with patients and their families and hear from physicians about their injuries. One was a 5-year-old girl with major spinal cord injuries from shelling; another was a 12-year-old boy who had a large cut in his abdomen from shrapnel, and his intestines were coming out. He and 11 other members of his family were injured by shrapnel while in their home two days ago and were hospitalized. Many others were awaiting or just coming out of surgery for removing shrapnel. -Peggy Gish, Christian peacemaker in Baghdad.

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March 24, 2003

Lab rats get their revenge...

As I've mentioned before in my blog, I work in a laboratory on campus that studies animal learning. We use rats... big, furry white rats. My rats are pretty cool, and I learn from them. But one things I don't like is the pointiness of their claws. Our new rats were supposed to start getting weighed today. They aren't used to being handled by people yet, so they thrash around when you pick them up. I weighed about 32 of them before I gave up, unwilling to sacrifice any more skin for the sake of science.

Hopefully in a few days they will be used to us, and they won't scratch and squeal when I pick them up. I have to weigh them again Friday. I'm bringing band-aids just in case.

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March 23, 2003

I met my scholarship donors

I met my scholarship donors today. It's so weird meeting these people who shelled out money for a complete stranger to go to college... Did I meet their expectations? I hope I did. Their money has not gone to waste.

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March 22, 2003

The best Saturday night: Friends with friends

Saturday night, people are out partying, probably intoxicated. What am I doing? Drinking? Partying? Starting trouble? Yeah right. I'm sitting here with my roomie watching about four-thousand consecutive episodes of Friends, starting with number one. Really, this is my kind of Saturday night. I don't have to look cute (like I ever look cute anyway), and I can lounge in my jammies all night. I love it.

Tomorrow I get to meet the folks who helped me through school by shelling out a few grand. I wonder what these people are like. Are they nice? Are they going to grill me about my grades, trying to figure out how deserving I am? Am I an idiot for being nervous about rubbing elbows with people who could buy and sell me at will? I dunno. It's only a luncheon. I shouldn't worry.

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War, the longest thread in the fabric of human history

All of my classmates were totally in outer space today, and everyone is on edge. The school has some good things planned, though, including a candle light peace vigil in the auditorium. I think it's so cool that even now, after the bombs have started falling, people haven't lost hope that the war will soon end. It will be really good to see something positive going on.

I'm intentionally avoiding watching television, because I just don't want to watch the explosions lighting up Baghdad. I've heard enough stories about the greusome destruction of war from my dad and grandmother, who lived through war in their homeland. I don't need to see it on CNN. I'd rather hang out at prayer vigils... where doing good is the focus.

There is too much hostility in the world. Violence. Hatred. Arrogance. Evil. It's everywhere, even in those who follow the One who condemns it. I guess his words commanding us to love went out a long time ago.

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March 20, 2003

Can we war forever?

All of my classmates were totally in outer space today. They stayed up all night watching the news, so they were tired (and worried). Everyone is on edge, and don't know what to think about what is going on. The school has some good things planned, though. Later tonight I'm going to a candle light peace vigil in the auditorium. I think it's so cool that even now, after the bombs have started falling, people haven't lost hope that the war will soon end. It will be really good to see something positive going on. I'm intentionally avoiding watching television, because I just don't want to watch the explosions lighting up Baghdad. I've heard enough stories about the greusome destruction of war from my dad and grandmother, who lived through war in their homelands. I don't need to see it on CNN. I'd rather hang out at prayer vigils... where doing good is the focus.

On a better note, Jaclyn has a new layout. I have the best hostees.

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March 19, 2003

Peace.

Peace.

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March 15, 2003

Dresses still suck

Ok, so trying on the dress wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I didn't have to get measured or anything, I just told them my size and they brought the dress around. At first I freaked out because the one they brought was a strappy sleeveless number, even though Missy told me they would have short sleeves. When I asked them about it, they brought another dress (with sleeves) and told me I could choose which one I wanted. Guess which one I picked.

I still have to find shoes, though, which can be a struggle in itself. I have to get them dyed to match the dress, which will probably cost me some. I don't like heels either. Give me Sketchers, give me boots, give me anything except strappy heeled shoes. I know, I'm being a brat again. It's my nature. Hopefully, none of my other friends will be getting married any time soon, so that I can take a breather in between bridesmaid dresses. I really hate those things. But I'll do it for friends. (And now they owe me! MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA)

Spring break is over. Boo. And Raddy has a new layout.

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March 14, 2003

Terror is a bridesmaid's dress

Everyone always told me as a kid that in order to overcome my fears, I'd have to face them head-on. Well, today I'm facing one of my biggest fears. I'm going to look that fear straight in the eye, and stare it down. I'm trying on bridesmaid's dresses today at David's Bridal.

Yuck.

I've done this once already, when my bro got married. I was in the wedding, and the dresses weren't half bad, but they were DRESSES (take note, those of you who don't know me well, I'm not a fancy dress kinda girl. Give me jeans and a black t-shirt and I'll be happy).

I just... don't wanna!

I keep telling myself, It's for Missy, she's been your friend since you were six years old, do it for her! But all I can think about is having to climb into some frilly number that I'll look ridiculous in. And the dresses are going to be misty haze... What color is THAT? Yeesh.

I'll tell you how it goes.

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March 09, 2003

Again, ungrateful

It's the second full day of spring break and I'm already complaining. I'm starting to experience friend-and-neighbor withdrawal, because being at home leaves me feeling so disconnected. I don't like it. And after getting home Friday, I came down with the sniffles, and now my head feels like an over-filled water balloon. But I'm happy that I'm at home where I've got my big comfy bed and my parents make me breakfast each morning. I'm such a princess.

Actually, I really shouldn't be complaining at all. Today when my family had lunch together, my sister-in-law told me of her friend's young daughter whose kidneys have been failing. They had to go shopping for her because her illness causes her to be extremely bloated, and she doesn't have clothes that fit. She needed stretchy pants that she can wear when she retains a lot of fluid. To limit her incredible bloating, she can only have three cups of fluid per day, and she can't go to school because her immune system is so weak.

When I hear about stories like that, my emotions go back and forth between gratitude (that I don't have that problem), guilt (that I complained about myself), and sorrow (for the one who's suffering like that). The more I think about it, the more I realize that in spite of all the difficulties in my life (and there have been many), I've had it pretty damn good. God's given me more than my fair share of the good life, and it's hard for me to imagine what it must be like for others.

I wonder what it's like to be a kid, and be so bloated that most pants will not fit. I wonder what it's like to be away from my friends at school all the time, and not just during a week-long break. And what does it feel like having an illness that turns your whole life around, before you're old enough to multiply? I don't know. I couldn't know, because I've never dealt with anything like it before. I've been too damn lucky.

Read March 9th, 2003.

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March 07, 2003

Going home for SPRING BREAK!

Going home for

SPRING BREAK!

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March 06, 2003

More evil nationalism

I got an e-mail the other day from a conservative group on campus inviting people to attend a "rally for America" in downtown Cleveland. The e-mail laid out the group's plans, which included driving to the east-side to "make fun" of peace demonstrators. After reading it (and deleting it from my inbox) I couldn't decide whether I was more angry or more discouraged. To me, this is proof that the world hasn't really changed from ancient, bloodthirsty times.

I still find it incredible that so many Christian groups are buying into the patriotic desire for vengeance. The campus group even included a blurb of scripture to support their position: When justice is done it brings joy to the righteous but terror to evil doers, Proverbs 21:15. Obviously, this shows God wants justice in the world. No arguments here. But my question is this: Does this verse give the United States a divine mandate to drop bombs anywhere evil doers exist? And will we realy be punishing the evil doers, or the innocent with this war?

"Yesterday we visited a medical research center where they have found a dramatic increase in leukemia and birth defects in children after the Gulf War. It appears to be related to the use of depleted uranium used by the American military in that war to make tank-piercing shells more effective." - Allan Slater, Christian volunteer for peace in Iraq.

Am I supposed to be suporting this, cheering this on?

"My son and husband are in the middle east right now defending your right to travel anywhere you feel you must go. If one of their bombs lands on you, too bad. You will have gotten your martydom and they will have succeeded in their mission. No more silent majority. We will arise and be as loud as you. But we have more defensive stuff at our disposal than you. Good luck and remember to duck and cover." - Anonymous poster, in response to Allan Slater.

Is this what it means to be patriotic nowadays? Anyone?

Divine wisdom from the author of life: Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God. -Matthew 5:9

I can't even begin to imagine how afraid the Iraqi people are tonight.

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March 04, 2003

Getting philosophical

I don't know what it is about late-night walks and conversations over cocoa au lait at Brewbaker's, but it always ends up with everyone turning philosophical. All I have to say is that I'm glad I know where I am, who I am, and who it is I believe in (and who it is that believes in me).

I'm the mystic. What are you?

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Back to being a lazy procrastinator

No more caffeine-induced hyperactivity today. After finishing my paper at 1:30 am and hitting the sack, I got up at 6:30 with my limbs feeling like they were tied down to the ground. After I got up I was kind of dizzy, which always happens when I haven't had enough sleep. I took a nap a little while ago, though, which was nice (at least until the phone chatter woke me up). But I feel better, which is good.

I'm counting down the days until spring break. I'm not going anywhere exciting (do I ever?) but it will be nice to spend a week without having to be up at 6:45 in the morning, or without having to take night classes when I just don't feel like leaving my cozy room. I plan on doing some work though, because I have a 10-20 page paper for Sensation & Perception that will be due soon, so I want to get that out of the way. And I'm going to paint.

Right now I'm getting ready for S&P; class at 6:15. We're getting our exams back today (yeesh) which I'm not looking forward to. On one of the essays I waivered between answering it one way and another. I wrote an answer, scribbled it out, then wrote a different one. After I handed it in, I looked in my notes and found that I was right the first time. My teachers in grade school always told me to go with my first instinct. I hate when they're right.

Three more days...

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March 03, 2003

So random...

Why does Sonafide look crappy in Netscape?

Netscape stinks.

Aj Hejt Skul.

I'll be up really late doing a paper tonight.

Caffeine in my veins.

Too much caffeine, way too much.

Hyperactivity.

I should be working on this evil paper.

The words are dancing on the screen.

Aj Hejt Skul.

I need sleep, badly.

Spring break where are you?

No more Mountain Dew.

Crap.

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March 02, 2003

Art really is a necessity

Every now and then when I get wrapped up in my psych work my sanity demands that I spend some time in an artistic environment. Today, while I was working in the computer lab, the senior art majors were busy next door hanging their artwork in the gallery for the 2003 senior show. I popped in an out, helping someone hang her stuff (actually more watching than helping, but it makes me sound a lot nicer when I say that I helped). I really needed to be sucked back in there for a day.

So far the show looks really good, though I'm a little depressed that there is nothing of mine hanging on the walls... I'm not going to be part of this year's show (or any year's show, for that matter) since I'm not an art major. I keep thinking that it would have been so kick ass to have been in there with them. I promised myself, though, that I wouldn't get jealous (at least not a lot). And I'm excited for everyone in this year's exhibit... all of the students who were in art classes with me are graduating this year, and this is their show.

Being in the gallery today gave me back the itch to pull out my dusty box of paints and brushes and get creative again. (I know, that implies I was creative before, but let's just pretend for now, okay?) I have all these ideas festering in my brain... things I want to do. I just wish each day had 48 hours so that I'd have time to flesh them out on paper. But this whole "getting an education" thing is getting in the way. Stupid classes.

I wish I could stay another year and take more art classes, turn my art minor into a major, and be part of the senior shindig. But that would take a significant amount of funds (which neither I nor my family has) so it's not going to happen unless God showers me with $15,000 in the immediate future. Considering the sorry state of the world these days, I'm guessing God has his mind on more important things (I know it's hard to believe, but Drina's art career probably isn't high on the Almighty's list of priorities). So I'm not going to bother Him by asking.

For now I'll just fantasize. And help some other art students hang their stuff. And maybe draw in the little spare time these 24-hour days afford me. I've got the itch, what else can I do?