August 30, 2002

Sucking it up

Okay, today there wasn't any PMS-ing, and no crying fits in public. I feel better.I went across the street to the art building last night to draw for a little bit. The drawing teacher had the still life set up. I'm not in the class, but I didn't think he would mind me drawing it -I didn't touch anything. I feel better when I draw. Down the hall, students were auditioning for an opera, so I had some nice background music. Those girls can belt out a tune the way I always wished I could. After they finished it was quiet. I was all by myself, and it was exactly what I needed. Me, a piece of conte crayon, a sheet of paper, and a boot. I do feel better. But my FTP is still not working. Fooey.

Going home.

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August 29, 2002

Sometimes life sucks

I don't know what it is about this day, why everything is going wrong. Why everything sucks. I got called to the financial aid office, only to be told that I no longer have any work study money. That means I probably can't work for the art department. And I don't know why. Tution was raised a few thousand this year, but my parents' salaries weren't. My dad doesn't even have a salary anymore. And now with him losing his job, and me not having a job, I don't know what I'm going to do. Maybe it's the PMS working its magic, but I started crying today at lunch, out of nowhere. It's stupid for me to get upset, because I know (just as everyone has been telling me) that everything will be fine. But getting this news, especially after having research methods this morning, I just want to stop wasting my family's money on this damn place and leave. It's too expensive (and seemingly pointless), but I've worked too hard to leave now. Dammit.

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Dammit, Research Methods

Research Methods terrifies me. My professor just went over the syllabus with the class. We have a paper to write, 25 pages, about an original research experiment we will be conducting next semester. Most of the other students in the class already have an idea about what their study will focus on. I have no clue whatsoever what it is I want to do. I figure I have a week or two to come up with something, because our hypothesis is not due for almost a month. I just wish something would pop into my head. Why did I ever decide to become a psych major anyway?

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August 27, 2002

What I love most

There is nothing better in the world than walking into a room and seeing familiar faces, friendly faces, looking back at you. I love Western Art II, even though my hand hurts from note-taking. Even though the teacher talks too fast for me to catch everything. Even though I only signed up because I had to. Even though it's three hours long. Everyone is there. I like that. After I got out of class at nine, I came back here for the floor meeting in my hall. Everyone, including people I don't know (though I've seen them walking around the floor the last couple days) is very cool. We all went into my room to take pictures (we have a flag hanging up that people wanted to stand in front of). There is a girl from my hometown of Euclid on my floor. There are also a few out-of-staters. I bet they felt homesick coming here for the first time.

Tomorrow I start printmaking. And that will be another class full of familiar people (yay). Cheesy. But nice. I want to make prints, messy as it may be, because I want cool new pieces to add to my online art gallery. It's expensive. I dropped $70 at the bookstore buying some of the supplies. I don't care. Whatever money I burn for this whole college thing, I have a feeling I'll still be provided for. God is cool like that. Don't ask me why some 'God' people are poor. I don't know. But I know I'm not. So I have no worries.

Time to make prints. Or, sleep really. Tomorrow it will be time to make prints.

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August 25, 2002

Stephanie, you are loved.

Stephanie, you are loved.

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Finally settled

I'm moved in. The room is set, and it's beautiful. My parents and my brother did most of the moving, but I'm here. And I saw some friends. And I love it. I don't feel like going to class tomorrow, but I guess it's better than having a job! This freshman girl down the way got freaked out and left for home. She's not coming back, and we haven't even started classes yet. Tragic.

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August 23, 2002

Move in day

Today was move-in day for the freshmen. Lots of homesickness going on around campus about now. I wonder how Deborah (former co-worker) is doing. I know she didn't want to leave home, and was nervous the last week. But I'll be on campus Sunday, and maybe I'll stop by her room and see how she's doing.

I'm such a lazy ass, I haven't finished my shopping, or my packing, or my anything. Nothing. I just keep saying to myself that I've got time. What kind of super procrastinator am I? I probably won't make it to City Buddha. I really wanted to get some saris to make curtains, but that's not going to happen. I wish I could stick to a schedule. Life would be so much easier.

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August 22, 2002

Left to buy this year

Items left to buy for school:
Dishwashing liquid
Curling iron (my sister's is off limits)
Notebooks
AAA batteries
Assignment planner
Saris from City Buddha
Floppy disks
Other stuff I know I'll forget

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August 21, 2002

Or maybe my memory sucks

I think I've been fantasizing a little too much this summer about my dorm room this year. I drove to school today to help Steph move in, and when I walked into our room I couldn't believe it was the same one I toured last May. It's a lot smaller than I remember. It's still bigger than the midget closet I had last year, but it still looks so small to me now. The room itself is weird. There is no flat space against any of the walls. They're all lined with pipes or wiring, so nothing can actually sit flat against the wall. It took an hour for us to decide where to put our beds. I think Steph's dad was annoyed with us, because we kept moving desks and futons and dressers back and forth accross the room, trying to figure the room layout. We'll probably still re-arrange stuff when I move in on Sunday.

I'm excited to start a new year, but I don't think I'm ready for the million and a half papers, exams, and projects I'll be forced to do this semester. My least favorite professor, Satan, is teaching Research Methods. That class is evil to begin with. I'll have to create and execute my own research study. But having to take it with Satan doubles my displeasure. I just don't wanna. God help me.

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August 20, 2002

Ditto for Japan

As soon as I mention my wonder for the ability of my web site to be seen by the nations, I get an e-mail from Japan. Did I not just say in my last post how strange it was for people to contact me... from Japan? A member of the U.S. Navy stationed in Japan decided to say hello. That amazes me. And speaking of the navy, I got an e-mail forward from my brother, who recieved it courtesy of our cousin Miro, who is in the navy (USS Abraham Lincoln.) Military humor:

The latest proposal to drive the Taliban and Al Quaeda out of the mountains of Afghanistan is to send in a team of West Virginia Special Forces. Billy Bob, Bubba, Boo, Scooter, and Cooter are being sent in with the following information about the Taliban:

1. There is no limit.
2. The season opened last weekend.
3. They taste just like chicken.
4. They don't like beer, pickup trucks, country music, or Jesus.
5. They were responsible for Dale Earnhardt's death.

Should be over in just about a week

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August 19, 2002

Yay for Sweden

I got my first Swedish e-mail today. Thanks, Sara. I may be a dork, but it still amazes me how a web site can be seen by people all over the world. That the pointless comments I write and pictures I display can be seen by people in Sweden, Japan, Germany, Canada, India... I get e-mails from other Drinas, from other artists, from other people who have time to waste on web sites. It's just... incredible. I may be an adult now, but I have not lost my sense of wonder. The world still amazes me. Amazing.

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We all love Photoshop

Oh, the things people do when they have no lives. Some nice photoshop work, though. I'm guessing it was a 24 year-old guy with no girlfriend. And who still lives with his parents. And who dropped out of high school, because he was too busy playing video games. I guess I shouldn't talk. I have a web site.

Last night I downloaded This Is Your Time by Michael W. Smith because I'm a big loser. No, I'm not a huge Smitty fan. I usually think Christian music is mostly cheesy, but I love that song. It makes you wonder, what would you say if faced with that question? What is more important, this life, or the next go-round? That song takes me back to those evil days, after the Columbine shooting. Everything was just dark. Dark, dark, dark.

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August 18, 2002

Baka's in surgery

My grandma is going into the hospital for surgery this week. Knee surgery. I guess it's not serious, but it sucks nontheless. I'm comforted, though, by the fact that she's 80 years old, and could probably kick my ass in two and a half seconds. She's fierce. Go Baka.

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August 17, 2002

We're all zombies

I'm so sleepy I could just curl up right here, in front of the computer. I think it's the weather. Hot. Humid. Sleepy-time conditions. Everyone's in a lull.

Today was my last day at work. I got three cards! I'm glad that I'll never have to do that evil job again, but I kinda miss my wonderful friends. We worked together. Complained together. Gossipped together. But library work is over. Thank you, all glorious and powerful God, that I never have to work there another day. Now I get to find another job at school to complain about.

EIGHT more days until move-in.

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August 14, 2002

The sock alien

I think the sock aliens that have been roaming the laundry room decided to snatch my keys for kicks. I can't find them anywhere. I though my dad also may have hidden them to play a joke on me, but he says he didn't take them, and they're nowhere to be found. My car key, my house key, my friend's cuff key (hope he doesn't use those). Crap.

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August 13, 2002

Chinese Proverbs

My brother, in his infinite wisdom, knew I needed a laugh, so he sent me this e-mail. Either that, or he was trying to procrastinate at work, and needed an excuse to look busy. Chinese Proverbs.

1. Man who run in front of car get tired.

2. Man who run behind car get exhausted.

3. Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

4. Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

5. Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.

6. Panties not best thing on earth! but next to best thing on earth.

7. War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.

8. Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.

9. Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

10. It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.

11. Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.

12. Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.

13. Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

14. Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.

15. Man who fart in church sit in own pew. (I've heard that one already!)

Thanks bro.

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August 11, 2002

Air Jaws 2

Air Jaws 2... this year's shark week is spectacular. The Air Jaws program had more shots of breaching white sharks, in California, Africa, and Australia. It was great. It's hard to believe that an animal weighing over a thousand pounds could completely clear the water. God I'm such a nerd.

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August 05, 2002

My must-do list

Things I need to do before moving back to school 8/25:

1. buy a cordless phone
2. wash the shaggy rug
3. download songs (no Morpheus at school)
4. buy books :(
5. finish still life painting
6. go clothes shopping
7. find shower shoes
8. get an oil change
9. buy a parking pass
10. watch SHARK WEEK

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Finally, my search has ended

I found it! Hallelujia I found the song... It was on the Philadelphia soundtrack. It's called "I don't wanna talk about it," and all I had to do was ask an Indigo Girls fan. Go figure. Idiot Drina didn't think to do that in the first place. Well, I have my song now, so I'm happy.

I really, really want to go see the movie Signs. I don't believe in crop circle aliens, no. I think I saw something on the Discovery Channel a while back about how crop circles are made. Give me a 2x4 and some rope and I can make one myself. But I heard the movie was good regardless. I want to see it.

And speaking of the Discovery Channel, being the nerd I am I can not wait for Shark Week. No 3D glasses this year, but I think they're doing some celebrity bits (like I care). Give me the sharks, dammit. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SHARK WEEK!

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August 03, 2002

So I'm a day late. Sue me.

Yeah, I know it's Saturday, but yesterday I was busy, so I'm doing the Friday 5 today.

1. What is your lineage? Where are your ancestors from?
I'm Croatian. My mom was born in Veliki Bukovec, Croatia, and my dad was born in Modrica, Bosnia.

2. Of those countries, which would you most like to visit?
I've already visited both. Croatia was nice, especially the beaches of Tucepi.

3. Which would you least like to visit? Why?
Bosnia. It's still a little scary.

4. Do you do anything during the year to celebrate or recognize your heritage?
Every year there is a Croatian festival somewhere in the U.S or Canada. Next year it will actually be in Croatia. My sister is part of a group that performs at the festivals, so we go every year.

5. Who were the first ancestors to move to your present country (parents, grandparents, etc)?
My parents!

By the way, thanks to Smattering.org for linking me as the current aortal site! I love, LOVE smattering.org. Thanks.

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Art and snobbery

Every time I crank out an art piece from my design class, I always have someone ask, what is it? I've come to expect this from my parents. I've explained to them that art doesn't always have to be a still life or portrait, but they still don't "understand" it. Nevertheless, they try to appreciate it anyway, which is cool. They don't scoff at that which doesn't fit their preferences.

But my parents have nothing on these people who have decided that they have the authority to say what is art, and what is not. If it's not a pretty portrait painted in the style of classical realism, it's not art. If it does not look like it came from several hundred years ago, it's not art. One wonders if they still consider a painting as art if it does not contain cherubs or fairies.

I love Mark Rothko. His paintings are beautiful. Period. And I would much rather have a Rothko than a painting of a person who was so delusioned, that he didn't know he was living in the 19th century. Coud Bouguereau not paint the life he saw, the time in which he lived? Why did he paint scenes from centuries past? And what's with the cherubs? He was not around for the Renaissance.

I suppose rock and hip hop are not music, either, because they are too loud and crude to ever be called "music." And they don't use violins either! How dare they think this noise could pass for music? ROTFL

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United States, Ohio, Cleveland, English, Croatian, Drina, Female, 21-25, painting, psychology.

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